


Wedding cake all over the forest ground

by Just_Another_Weirdo



Series: The things I do for love [7]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Crying, Food Fight, Gangs (mention), I accidentally added Joan into this and I don't even know how, I shall create more journalist Patton then, Janus adopted them, Janus doesn't like the police, Journalist Patton, Kidnapping, Light Angst, M/M, Men Crying, Nonbinary Deceit | Janus Sanders, Other, Remus is also a really bad driver, Trans Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Trans Male Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Transphobia, Weddings, molotovs, what do you mean that tag didn't exist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:40:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26408122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_Another_Weirdo/pseuds/Just_Another_Weirdo
Summary: This was supposed to be the happiest day of his life. When he'd walk up the altar, give a shitty speech and kiss Patton in front of everyone.So why was Remus crying on Janus's shoulder?Aka, this fandom needed more intruality, so I made some.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: The things I do for love [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727602
Comments: 11
Kudos: 53





	Wedding cake all over the forest ground

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, Logan and Roman are girls in here for the following reasons:  
> 1 I like writing female characters and Sanders sides doesn't have (for obvious reasons)  
> 2 Pretty girls in dresses with swords make my heart go BOOM. And Roman is one of those.  
> 3 I wanted to, ok? Ok.  
> (Again I didn't change the names cause I'm lazy)
> 
> Also, things I don't mention but might give some context:  
> Virgil used to be a cop before Janus and Remus showed him what his conservative asshole parents never taught him. They also helped him realize that he, indeed, was a boy.  
> The twins and Janus have committed arson a few times. Patton might've helped in the pasts.  
> Their families don't show up in the wedding because I'm lazy, but for the sake of the plot let's say they don't have very nice parents...

Virgil looked at his friend’s tux. He tsked.

Remus kept adjusting his flower and checking himself in the mirror. It had to be perfect.

“You should’ve chosen the dress” Virgil said, watching from a chair. “The tux makes you look too responsible”

“I can be responsible!” Remus said, stepping away from the mirror. “I took care of an octopus for ten years without it dying.”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “The only reasons Mrs Snuffles the Second is still alive are your sister and Patton.”

“Hush now, emo boy” Remus said. “You can’t be mean to me on my wedding day.”

“Whatever” Virgil said. “Want to go through your vows again?”

“Sure,” Remus said, sitting next to him. “I, Remus King Soon-To-Be-Sanders, vow to love and cherish you until one of us goes into Hades’s realm, and the other has to come after them. And probably after that.”

“You have to make HadesTown references?” Virgil asked, moving to sit gayer.

“Well, duh, now let me continue.” Remus said, nudging him. “And if I ever had the chance to, I would chose not to die for you, but to live with you and protect you as best as I can.”

“Wow, that’s sappier than I expected.” Virgil said. He got up from the chair. “Imma go ask Janus if Patton’s ready. Wait here.”

“Virgiiiiilll.” Remus whined, laying dramatically against his chair. “Don’t leave me, let’s just run away together!”

Virgil laughed. “Yeah, and commit arson instead of having a wedding?” He opened the door. “Yes to arson, no to running away together. You’re too gross for me”

Remus sticked his tongue at Virgil as the other left laughing. He just had to wait a bit longer until Patton finished.

Patton woke up with a dull headache. He took a few seconds to realize were he was, as he was not wearing his glasses. He looked at the concrete walls and realised he should be at the altar, with Remus.

Not tied to a chair in an empty room.

He felt fear rise on his throat as he trashed against the ropes, trying to get out of there. The ropes scratched against his skin, leaving blood and marks.

Once the initial fear was gone, he was left with pain on his wrists and the dawning realization that no one would know were he was.

Remus wouldn’t know.

Oh, god, Remus wouldn’t know. He’d think Patton had left him on the day of their wedding. He’d be heart broken.

Ok, ok, calm down. Maybe Patton could still make it, if he got out of here. No, not if, when. He’d make it up for Remus, take him to a scary gory movie, despite hating those. Anything to make Remus happy again.

He’d just had to get out. Maybe someone here could help him.

“Hello?” He called, not louder than a whisper. “Hello?” He tried again, louder. “Is there anyone here?”

He waited for a few seconds, but there was no answer.

“Hello?” He shouted. “I’m awake!”

After a while, there were footsteps behind him, and a voice spoke.

“You should keep quiet.” The voice said. Patton was surprised when he heard it was a teenager’s voice. “Dad is going to hear you if you’re not quiet.”

“Oh.” Patton said. “Ok.” He waited for the kid to say anything. They didn’t. “Do you know why I’m here?”

The kid behind him kept quiet. “I just shrugged.” They said after a moment. “I think dad wanted to force the press to retract an article, or something.”

Oh. _Oh_.

“The one about gang violence being ignored by the police or the one about big companies profiting of gang violence?” Patton asked.

The kid behind him moved, and Patton heard a chair being dragged. After a few moments, a scrawny kid with an orange beanie walked to be in front of him, sitting on the chair they had taken.

They shrugged again. “Does it matter?”

“Well, I am a journalist.” Patton said. “I need to know the details.”

“Dad is head of the gang.” The kid said, avoiding Patton’s gaze. “The company that supported him bankrupted due the media, so he wants the press to take it back.”

“Kidnapping someone will probably not help their reputation…” Patton said.

The kid scoffed. “I know, but Dad has never been the brighter of the bunch.” They said. Patton hummed in agreement. “I shouldn’t be here…”

“Well, kiddo” Patton said. “I should be getting married, so we’re both where we aren’t supposed.”

“Oh.” The kid said. “Sorry about that. I still can’t let you go, though.”

“It’s ok.” Patton said, smiling though he didn’t want to smile. “It’s ok” He repeated, as if to try and convince himself.

He didn’t succeed.

Remus had been told that Patton had to stop by home to grab his cat cardigan. He had insisted on wearing it for the wedding. So he waited.

He told everyone to wait a bit longer after half an hour.

He tried to stop Logan and Virgil from leaving after hour and a half.

He watched his sister leave claiming she was going to search for Patton after two hours.

He was crying on his best friend’s shoulder after two hours and fifteen minutes.

Janus kept whispering words of comfort that were meaningless to Remus as they ran their hands through his hair. They ignored the way Remus got their vest dirty with tears and mucus. They just sat there, on the stairs to the altar, holding their best friend as he tried to hold his broken heart together.

Janus had felt the urge to murder people many times in their life. They liked to think they would never feel that for someone like Patton, the literal embodiment of sunshine.

Yet here they were, trying to fight the murder thoughts out of their head. Remus needed Janus now, not Janus off murdering someone.

Roman could do that for them.

After two hours, eighteen minutes and forty six seconds, Remus’s song started ringing.

Janus kept their hand on his hair as they reached out to take the phone. They turned to ask if Remus would mind if they answered, but their friend gave no sign of going to answer any question anytime soon.

Janus accepted the call and put the phone on speaker.

“ _Remus?_ ” Roman’s voice was heard. “ _Remus, are you there?_ ”

Remus detached himself from Janus’s embrace and cleaned his tears with the back of his hand. “Yeah.” He said, with a nasal voice. “Did you find Patton?”

“ _No._ ” Roman said. “ _Remus, I went to your house. His car is still there and it looks like someone broke in_ ”

“What do you mean?” Janus chimed in.

“ _Oh, hi Jan._ ” Roman said. “ _Unless someone broke the window since the last time I was here, someone broke in._ ”

Remus cleaned his nose with Janus’s capelet. “The window was in perfect state.”

“ _Well, it isn’t now._ ” Roman said. “ _I’m going inside._ ”

“Don’t go inside, you idiot.” Remus said. “You’ll get murdered.” Realization reached him like a train. “Oh, god, Patton is dead. Someone murdered him.”

“We don’t know that yet.” Janus said. “Wait for us, Ro, please?”

“We should call the police.” Roman said.

“No!” Janus practically shouted. “Roman, you’re a black trans woman, Remus and Patton are a gay interracial couple, and god knows most police officers know me from arson charges and other riots! They will not help us, if anything, they’ll make things worse!”

“Fine. Then what do we do?” Roman asked.

“Give us five minutes, we’ll be there” Janus said, hanging up. They got to their feet and pulled Remus along. “Come on, let’s go.”

Remus followed them to the car. “My house is fifteen minutes away…” He said.

“I’m letting you drive.” Janus said, getting into the passenger seat. “Don’t kill us, I’ll call Virgil to see if his ex-friends know anything about any kidnappings.”

Remus didn’t stop to listen to what Janus said after they told him he could drive. He was not going to lose any second to do so. He had to find Patton. Alive.

Let’s just say Janus had a hard time not throwing up.

“I was in a protest. A peaceful one, for trans rights. And I see this cop. They’re about to throw tear gas to a group of three teenagers that weren’t doing anything more than I was. So, I grab my friend, she knows how to put out tear gas with a traffic cone and water. Lots of water. We run up there, but before we can do anything, this kid–we were both kids to be honest– takes the tear gas with his bare hands and throws it back at the police. The other two cheer. But then the police throw another one, and this time me and my friend put it out. Apparently, we impressed the three kids, cause they asked us to hang out later. And we did. We had pizza. It was fun.”

Patton looked at the kid in front of him. They looked amazed.

“Your fiancee sounds amazing. Is he the one that yeets the tear gas?” They asked, as if they were talking about the newest show on tv. With the same excitement that says ‘I’ve become emotionally attached to this characters, there’s no letting go now’.

“Yeah. He was there with his sister and their friend.” Patton said. “His sister will probably want my head for leaving him on the altar…”

“Sorry about that…” The kid apologised. Again. This was the fifth time. “What about the other friend?”

“Oh, they’re really nice. A bit of an arsonist.” Patton said.

“They…?” The kid asked.

“They’re nonbinary!” Patton explained. “They have such power they transcend gender.”

The kid stopped to stare at the distance. Invisible equations seemed to appear n front of their eyes. “Adults can be nonbinary?”

“Well, of course!” Patton said. “Why would you think otherwise?”

“Dad said that it was just a phase when I came out to him…” The kid said.

“Well, kiddo, your dad is wrong!” Patton said. “Anyone can be nonbinary, you’re just lucky you found out you were so young.”

“Oh… ok…” They said, not sounding very convinced. “Do you… eh… have a phone in you?”

Patton blinked when he realised what the kid was asking for. “Yes. It should be on the left pocket of my jacket.”

He watched the kid approach shyly, taking the phone from his pocket. He turned it on and looked at Patton, waiting to be told the password.

“The password is Sher.” Patton said. “All capital letters.”

The kid nodded as they typed in the password.

Patton wondered if they knew what they were doing.

The kid did not know what they were doing.

“Can you go alone?” Virgil asked, not moving from the driver’s seat.

“You don’t want to face your old coworkers?” Logan said, stopping her motion to open the door.

Virgil shrugged. “Not really. I didn’t leave on good terms.”

“Yes, Janus has told me how they ‘lured you into the dark side’” Logan said.

Virgil laughed. “What a drama bitch. They just dragged me into a protest and I figured out how shit worked after that. My parents still refuse to talk to me for that.”

“Well, if losing two conservative morons’s influence is the price to pay to leave a corrupted organization and finally come to terms with your true identity, I think you won more than you lost.” Logan said, exiting the car. “I’ll go ask, just wait here.”

“Yeah, I probably did…” Virgil said, as he watched Logan enter the police station.

Logan wasn’t surprised when she found mostly peace and quiet inside. Most media depicted police stations as constant chaos. But even chaos needed a lunch break.

She walked towards the reception table, where a man too old for the job was eating.

“Excuse me?” She said, trying to get his attention. “I’m a friend of Virgil’s? He used to work here…”

The man noticed Logan and made a gesture to wait a second. He finished his sandwich and turned to her.

“Is that what she’s going as this days?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Anyways, are you here to pick the stuff she left?”

“No, I didn’t come for _his_ stuff.” Logan said, making emphasis on the his. “I was wondering if you’ve heard of any kidnapping cases recently? Of a journalist?”

The man ignored the emphasis. “No, we hadn’t had anything like that in a while. Are you gonna get her stuff or what?”

Logan forced a smile. She was getting the urge of punching this old jerk on the face. “No, thank you. I have to talk to _Virgil_ first. _He_ ’ll decide.”

She didn’t wait for any response. Simply walking to the car again. She opened the car door with more strength than she should use and let herself fall against the seat.

“I hate cops.” She said.

“Mood.” Virgil said back. “I got a call though, Roman says they know were Patton is.”

“Then what are we doing here?” Logan asked, starting to put on her seatbelt. “Let’s go.”

“I might need you to go inside again…” Virgil said. “I have a plan.”

Roman approached Janus as Remus ran into his house. They looked as if they were holding back puke.

“You ok?” She asked, as they started to walk inside the house as well. Janus just nodded.

“Never let your brother drive.” They said, stepping inside the house. “Let’s just hope Patton is here…”

Roman nodded. She watched Janus go into the top floor to check the rooms. She decided to look through the kitchen and Patton’s office, and Remus’s aquarium. Nothing. At least Mrs Snuffles the Second was alright…

She walked into the living room. Remus was sitting on the couch, holding Patton’s cardigan close to his chest and starting to sob his eyes out again.

Roman was heading towards her brother when she saw something on the corner of her eye. She changed direction and knelt to look under the table.

She pulled out Patton’s glasses, or what was left of them. One crystal was missing and the other was scratched.

Roman sat next to Remus, showing him the glasses.

Remus just sobbed louder.

Janus entered the living room. “There’s nothing upstairs, did you find anything?” They saw Remus sobbing into his sister’s arms. “I guess that’s a no…”

They sat next to Remus, wrapping their arm around the siblings.

All three of them stayed like that for a while. The only sound made was Remus’s sobs and the background noise of Mrs Snuffles’s aquarium.

And then Remus’s phone started playing.

Janus moved to accept the call, stopping when they saw the caller.

“It’s Patton.” They said, handing the phone over to Remus.

Remus shot up to accept the call. He placed it into speaker before starting to shout at it.

“Patton! Are you ok?! Did they kill you? Torture you? Iswear I’ll make them pay if they even touch you.” Remus started, his voice congested from crying. Janus had to hold him before he started pulling his own hair. “Pease be ok.”

“Patton is ok.” A voice said. A kid’s voice.

“How old are you?” Janus asked, their parent instincts kicking in. “And where are you?”

“I’m twelve.” The voice responded. “Dad took Patton because of something he wrote. I told him not to hurt him.”

“Where are you?” Remus asked. “I need to see him, please, just tell me where he is!”

“Remus, calm down.” Roman said. “You’re going to have a meltdown if you don’t.”

“How can I calm down when my fiancee is kidnapped?! HUH?!” Remus exclaimed, pushing her aside.

“I’ll send you the location.” The kid said. “Please don’t hurt my dad.” Having said so, they hanged up.

Remus felt the urge to throw the phone at the wall. Or himself at the wall, see how long it’d take for his bones to break.

Janus placed a hand on his shoulder. “You” they said. “Need to calm the fuck down. Roman, call Virgil and tell him about this. Remus, come with me.”

Roman nodded, pulling out her phone.

Janus dragged Remus to the kitchen.

“Are you gonna scold me like a child?” Remus asked, crossing his arms.

“No.” Janus said. “We’re going to channel your anger through other means.” They pulled out an empty bottle from a drawer. “Also, you’ll apologise to your sister later. Pushing someone of the couch isn’t nice.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He grumbled. “What’s the bottle for?”

Janus just limited themselves to smirking. “I hope you remember how to make a molotov cocktail.” Janus said, handing it to him.

Remus scoffed. “Who do you take me for? Of course I remember.”

“The things I do for love” That was the mantra in Logan’s head, as she ran out of the police station, with a bag of what Virgil had asked for. This plan of his better work.

She ran out of the station and didn’t stop to check if someone was following her. She ran to Virgil’s car and threw the bag inside, before throwing herself inside.

“Go. Now.” She said, closing the door at the same time she put her seatbelt on.

Virgil didn’t need to be told twice. He started the car and took off.

“Did you get everything?” He asked, looking at her from the rear view mirror.

“Yes” Logan said. She redid her pony tail. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“Oh, Logan” Virgil said. “You should know by now that I have zero idea of what I’m doing all the time.”

Patton and the kid were just chilling. Vibing. Whatever you want to call listening to quiet music and waiting for Patton’s fiancee to rescue Patton.

No one said anything, simply listening to Patton’s random playlist.

And then there was an explosion outside.

Patton and the kid looked at each other for a few seconds. Another explosion.

The kid jumped from their chair, running to untie Patton. They struggled with the ropes, trying and failing to set Patton free.

They heard voices outside, men yelling at each other, none of them familiar to Patton.

Then the door was opened, and Patton heard a familiar voice.

Roman ran to him, making the kid back away.

“What are you doing here with a sword?!” Patton asked.

Roman blinked confused. “Rescuing you.” She said, cutting the ropes with the sword. “Duh.”

Patton massaged his wrists. “Where’s Remus?”

“Outside, throwing Molotovs with Logan.” Roman said. “If you hear sirens, that’s Virgil. Janus is at the megaphone pretending to be a cop.” She turned to the kid. “You’re the one that called, right?”

“Yes.” Patton answered for the kid, who was very intimidated by Roman’s sword. “Kiddo, this is Roman, she’s my sister in law. Roman this is…” Patton blinked when he realised he hadn’t asked for the kid’s name. “What’s your name kiddo?”

“I ehm… don’t have one yet…” They muttered.

“That’s ok, take your time.” Patton assured. “In the mean time, do you mind if I call you kiddo?”

The kid shrugged and shook their head.

Roman looked at both of them. She sighted. “Patton, did you adopt a child while you were kidnapped?”

“Maybe…?” Patton said. “Only if they want. By the way, kiddo, you should really come with us.”

“Yeah, and we should really get out of here.” Roman said. “I don’t think this” She raised her sword. “Will do much against guns if they have those.”

“They do.” The kid said. “You’re sure I can go with you?”

“Yes, kiddo, come on.” Patton said, taking them by the hand.

Roman led the way outside, running to where Logan and Remus were waiting. Or, well, Logan was waiting, Remus ran the moment he saw Patton.

He tackled him into a hug, almost throwing both of them into the ground.

There were sirens in the background.

Remus spun Patton around, lifting him from the ground. He cupped his face, searching for any injuries.

“Are you ok? Did they hurt you? Do I need to kill anyone?” He said, searching for wounds.

Patton laughed. “Remus, I’m fine.” He grabbed Remus’s hands softly. “I’m alright.”

“Your wrists…” Remus said, noticing the marks Patton had. “I’m going to kill them.”

“Please don’t kill my dad.” The kid said, looking awfully out of place.

Remus looked at the kid, then at Patton, then at the kid, then at his sister. “Where do you come out from?”

“They helped me escape.” Patton explained.

“So you adopted them?” Remus asked. “Without my permission?”

“You threw Molotovs without my permission.” Patton said.

“Sorry…” Remus said

“You know how much I like throwing Molotovs!” Patton cut him off, holding back laughter.

Remus pulled another one from his bag. “Well someone has to block this exit so they don’t follow us…” He smiled mischievously as he handed it to Patton.

Patton looked at it with sparkly eyes. “I love you.” He whispered, taking it. He yelled yeet as he threw it to the door by which they had exited.

The kid turned to Logan and Roman. “Are they always like this?”

“Remus is a bad influence…” Roman said. “Yes. They’re always like this. Gross”

“Janus is the one that gave him the idea.” Logan pointed out. She turned to Roman. “And didn’t you enjoy romance?”

“I enjoy the idea of romance, not seeing how my brother and Patton interchange saliva.” Roman said, grimacing at the couple.

“You four are weird…” The kid said.

“Wait until you meet Janus and Virgil…” Logan said.

As if on queue, they heard Janus shouting at them, this time not through a megaphone.

“The actual police is coming, we need to get out of here!” They yelled, sticking out of the car’s window as Virgil drove. “Come on! Get in!”

Logan sighted as she watched Roman and Remus race for the copilot’s seat. Patton was also dragged into it by Remus, who was never gonna let him go. At least until they got finally married.

She turned towards the kid. “You’re either going to regret this deeply or not going to regret this at all. That’s how this family works.”

Having said so, both of them rushed into the car before the police arrived.

Two weeks, the start of an adoption and a bunch of suits and dresses fixed later, Remus and Patton were standing on the makeshift altar deep into the woods.

The kid, who had finally chosen their name, Joan, had thrown flowers everywhere, making sure they landed in places where new flowers would grow.

Janus was performing the ceremony, trying to ignore the flowers that had tangled into their hair.

“Now, you may kiss the groom.”

Before they had finished talking, Remus threw the bouquet and lunched to kiss Patton, swooping him off the ground.

The bouquet hit Logan in the face. She was not amused. ~~Well, maybe a little~~.

The seven of them moved to the picnic area, were Roman had managed to carry the cake without messing it up, despite it being taller than all of them. The size was also Roman’s fault. She got overexcited.

Janus sighted as they watched their newly adopted child start competing with Remus and Patton to see who could eat more cake. Roman kept teasing Logan over the bouquet.

Virgil laughed next to them.

“What’s so funny?” Janus asked, taking a piece of the too big for all seven of them cake.

“Remus listened to me.” Virgil said, pointing at Remus’s dress. “The dress suits him so much better.”

“It does.” Janus agreed. “It’s going to end up soaked with cake, though.”

As if to prove their point, Remus dropped half his piece of cake, spoiling all his dress. Patton laughed, taking it with the spoon and feeding it back to Remus.

Then Logan got tired of Roman’s teasing and smacked her with a plate full of cake.

Everyone went quiet for a second.

“Oh, it’s on.” Roman said, taking a piece of cake and throwing it at Logan’s face.

“FOOD WAR” Joan yelled, dumping their piece of cake on Patton’s hair. It dripped onto his cat cardigan as well.

Janus sighted and dodged one of Remus’s throw. “This is going to be a mess.”

“Bring it on.” Virgil said, betraying Janus’s trust by smacking them with a hand full of cake.

At least the forest animals enjoyed the cake.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this, leave a comment if you want, it helps my brain produce dopamine.


End file.
